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Sugary Cinni-Mini’s

Look at this. Look at it. This is the mouth orgasm they should have warned you about. I mean a mouth abstinence class where they passed out Oragel, and told you you have to pay the consequences. Be scared of eating all of them because it is a HUGE possibility. Okay, I trailed off there. But you get it.

Anyways, you can Doctor these, healthify them, set them free from their evil Gluten Ways, etc. I didn’t because I had never attempted donuts prior to this. What wizardry was involved? Would I swear off ever making them again? Could I pretend I didn’t care they were unhealthy? All things I questioned as I threw random shit into a bowl. (The answer to the last question, by the way, is I’m actually pretty good at turning a blind eye, so I’ve learned!)

A Tear For My Thighs Because I Ate Entirely Too Many Of These.

Ingredients:

2 Cups AP Flour

3/4 Cups sugar

3/4 TS Cinnamon

2 TS Baking Powder

1 TS salt

3/4 Cup Milk (any kind, lactaid, Almond, regular)

1.5 TS lemon juice (Or white vinegar)

2 Beaten Eggs

2 TBS Butter or Margarine

1.5 TS Vanilla Extract

Set that oven to 325 degrees. Unless you don’t like to follow rules, and then pretend I didn’t say that. Lightly grease or spray a donut pan. In a measuring cup or bowl pour in milk. Add lemon juice (vinegar) and let sit 5 minutes. In a large bowl mix together dry ingredients like a boss. Look at you go. Alright, calm it. This is not a competition on who put more effort into their mixing; you win dude.

In a small bowl, mix together your wet ingredients. Again…calm yourself, Julia Child. Mix until fairly combined. (Tip-let the butter cool slightly unless you want scrambled eggs.)

Pour wet into dry. Blend until just combined. Now, Fill that donut pan. And don’t be a whine ass about it. It IS work, I know. Count it as a workout, so you can eat more donuts. You probably don’t want to fill it more than top level. Bake 7-11 Minutes. I got a good solid 7-8 Minutes and they were cooked like a turkey and were springy but firm when poked with my eager fingers. Picture a firm air mattress.

Look At These Balls Of Fun. Okay, Not Balls. Don’t Judge.

Give them a whole 2 or so minutes to cool before you try and pry them out of the pan. NO DON’T EAT IT ONCE IT’S OUT!!!! You need toppings, son.

Stick (8 TBS) Butter, melted—in a separate bowl mix—

1 TBS Cinnamon

1/3 Cup Brown Sugar

1/3 Cup Sugar

 

Such Fine China.

Drop the donut into the butter. flip over so it’s coated. Remove, and swirl the top in the cinn-sugar mixture. Place somewhere out of sight so you can finish the other 23 donuts without it taunting you to devour it.

 

Optional: Clean Off Sugar To Find Center. Or Don’t. I Won’t Judge.

 

I can’t promise I won’t ever sound like a toolbag for a future recipe. I’m sorry if that means we can’t be friends.

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Mango Swai

First off…Most of my recipes will have actual measurements. Secondly, they will all have a varition of some God-awful mobile phone picture, because only cool rich people can afford something better than a potato to take pictures with.

Upon throwing things together in my kitchen, we get this lovely number. It’s flavorful enough it can stand on it’s own, but feel free to serve with rice or even on a salad. You can use essentially any white fish; I just had Swai on hand.

Ingredients:

Generic Tastiness At Its Finest

2 Swai filets, cut in half

Mango Juicy Juice, to cover the fish almost all the way

TBS Coconut Oil, melted

1-2 TS Lemon Juice

1 TBS Minced Garlic

2-3 Shakes Soy Sauce

Honey Mustard

Dijon Mustard

(This recipe is to taste. You can’t really go wrong.)

In a medium bowl pour in your juice. Eyeball it, you can always add more. Add the garlic, melted oil, lemon juice. Stir. Add around 1-2 TBS Honey Mustard and 1-2 TBS Dijon, given personal preference. Microwave 15 seconds to make sure oil stays melted. Stir again, place in fish. Pour more juice if needed to cover fish. Let sit 5 minutes and flip fish. Sit another 5 minutes. Heat nonstick pan on medium to medium high heat. Place fish carefully in pan and begin cooking, saving marinade. When the fish has begun to turn white on the bottom pour in marinade.

Looks Gross, Smells Like Summer

Flip fish to finish cooking. Let simmer at medium/medium-high until fish is cooked (easily flakes with fork, white in center.) Remove and serve.

Ignore How God-Awful This Picture Is. Just Imagine Smelling The Fish, With Its Non-Fishy Smell. And How Awesome It Tastes. I Should Have Made It Presentable For Posting, But I Was Less Concerned With Cleaning Up The Plate And More Concerned Feeding The Toddler Trying To Snag It Off The Stove.

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Well, This Is Awkward…

I made this blog in a fit of spontaneous motivation. I had planned on posting regularly. It’s been at least…at LEAST a month…or three. Well because I live in New York and it’s almost March, it’s just been deemed ‘blog posting day.’ Why does NY and March have anything to do with me typing up the recipes I’ve been promising, the tips I’ve been stashing away? Because in NY, you can get 4 inches of snow in 45 minutes when it was 50 freaking degrees the day before.

It may take some time to get the ball (blog!) rolling. I have a three month old, a two year old, and usually a breast pump attached to me at all times. Right now two of those three are on me. The other is pretending he’s a goat eating cheerios off the floor. Maybe they taste better; I don’t know. I just blame all the weird creepy traits he has on his father. (I know I didn’t chew the crib up as a 6 month old. Or eat wasabi off a fork. And I certainly did not constantly stick one hand up my nose and the other in the front of my diaper.) So please be patient with me as a single mama, coupon activist, Baking extremist, work out enthusiast, sleep deprived, crazy woman.

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Merry Christmas To Me

So, I’ve been saying I was going to start a blog for months now. Mostly to document my boys and share what hacks and tips, recipes even, work with us. I must say starting a blog was in equal parts to get back into writing again and get away from the humdrum of Facebook. But mostly, the sharing of this infinite, albeit, common knowledge.

So for Christmas, I gave myself a swift kick in the butt and here we are.